BLESSING OF PATIENCE

"Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.  See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." -- Psalm 139:23-24

During family prayer time last night, I shared with Marcel that God has made Himself really clear to me this year.  He wants me to grow into a more PATIENT and MERCIFUL person.


I don't think I'm ready to share about mercy as yet.  If you would please keep me in your prayer through this struggle, I would really appreciate that.  I'm hopeful that one day I will be sharing with you the blessing of being merciful.  Until then, please lift me up in your prayer.


So please allow me to share with you about patience first.  


Yesterday was a great milestone in His teaching of patience to me.  After nine months of waiting and wondering, I finally received an update on the company re-org.  It was announced yesterday that our California office will be closed by the end of this year and moved to New York.  This means that everyone who is working in the CA office and those who are working remotely for the CA-based groups will either have to relocate to NY or find a new job within these 3 months.  Of course for me relocation is not an option.  Though the news was very devastating to hear, it really had brought a closure to me.  Now I can move on to plan the next step.  Now everything has been confirmed.  No more rumor or hijacked mind.  No more dragging my feet to work every morning fearing another person couldn't stand the wait and leave the company (we've had too many of these in the past 2 months alone) :-)


After the announcement, we were called to have a one-on-one with the President.  As I entered the room, the President asked me, "How do you feel?"


I explained to her that I was really looking forward to the meeting (where she made the announcement) because it's been a long wait.  I went on to say that when I came in to work in the morning, I was prepared for this kind of news.  Of course, a part of me was still hoping that the company would keep the West Coast office.  But I have faith in the direction that the upper management has taken to make the company more scalable.


I want to give all the credit to God for being patient in teaching me patience.  I realize it's not an easy decision for the company to make.  Nine months seemed to be so long for me.  I was hoping God would give me some hints along the way.  Every day I prayed, "God, did you hear anything yet???"  So annoying, I know HAHHA.  But 9 months was probably like 1 month for the management.  And I praise God for teaching me the right attitude of waiting, being patient, and embracing the news.


As for the next step for me?  Friends and family members have been suggesting some great idea of what I should do.  But I would like to hear what God wants me to do next year.  Exciting exciting!!!!!!!  God's perfect timing is exciting exciting!!!!!! 


And just to keep a running list of blessing of patience:

• After 3 months of waiting, my biking glasses were finally manufactured and shipped for the lenses installation yesterday.  YAYYY.  It's been back-ordered since June.  I'm excited to pick these up in 2 weeks.
• After 2.5 months of learning, I was brave enough yesterday to bike on the street without supervision while having my bike shoes on.  Praise the Lord for not falling.  Yayyyy!!!
• After 4 months of waiting, my work authorization card finally arrived.  I've been back to working again since last Thursday.  I praise God for the 2.5-week productive leave and the new card.
• After one week back to work, my network account is finally re-activated.  It's really nice to be able to do the work while at work.

I can go on and on and on here.  HAHAHA.  All the "Why can't I have it now?  Why can't I know it now?  Why can't I do it now?" are all to teach me patience.  My NOW's needed to be processed a little bit :-) . 

But to close, I believe that there's a plan for everything that happens.  And I know that God is teaching me patience to prepare me for the next challenge in my growth.  To lead me in the way that is everlasting.  Soooo ... I'm really looking forward to it, Lord!

May this be a blessing!